clothes off chronicles
by lucidic
Summary: Sometimes all it takes to get comfortable, is a little skin on skin contact.


**who **Sasuke and Sakura, with a little friendly nudge from Naruto and Sai  
**what **one-shot, the joy of blind dates  
**where **oh, I could name a few places...  
**when **about three days  
**why **you know those Levi's 501 commercials? yeah, they're hot

**WARNING **actually, it's nothing too intense. just…watch out.

**disclaimer **nooope.

* * *

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"But, _why not_?" Naruto whined.

Uchiha Sasuke sighed, ignoring the pouting blonde next to him, and took another sip of his beer. The sound of the irate soccer fans blared on the television in front of him as an almost impossible shot was made into the goal, filling the silence that was left as the others–as in Kiba, Shino, and Lee–were out on a beer run they had yet to return from. Which meant he was left alone with his idiot of a best friend in his apartment, and how could he forget?

"Sometimes I wonder if _you're_ the dickless one."

–Sai.

He was sitting in the lounger, diagonal from where Sasuke was seated on the couch, doodling some imaginary animal or whatever. But that wasn't the point; the point was that he was actually agreeing with something that Naruto said, which had stopped Sasuke from commenting about that one Christmas party at Hinata's when he had gotten into the wine-filled chocolates. And to make a long story short, it ended horribly, graphically wrong with an electrical socket, a wire hanger, and Rock Lee's most valuable possessions.

Let's just say it was kinky, disturbing–

And never to be spoke of again.

"Shut up," Sasuke growled, as his best mate continued.

"I mean, I don't understand why you're being so difficult," Naruto stated, with a sigh. He lounged between the back and the arm of the couch, ruffling his hair with an exasperated expression. "It's just _one _blind date."

"Yeah, dickless."

"No."

"But you haven't even met the girl!"

"I don't care."

Discouraged for a moment, Naruto threw up his hands in aggravation and slouched deeper in the soft material of the couch. It didn't make any sense, he had already told him all about her–she was cute, she was smart, she was clever. And most importantly, she was available _and _interested. A rare combination when it came to the situation of the Uchiha. Usually the women interested in him were taken, and ones who were available were instantly turned off by his frigid personality. Opportunities like this were few and far in between, and for the life of him, Naruto couldn't understand why he wasn't taking it advantage of it.

He was _such _a butthead.

But then, a sudden scheme planted itself in his hyperactive mind, and a maniacal gleam shone in his sky blue eyes. Sensing a shift in the blonde's demeanor, Sasuke snuck a quick side glance and began to feel a slight suspicion toward the mad Uzumaki.

"What if..." he began, letting a sly grin spread across his face. "I _dare _you to go on the date?"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "I'm still no– "

"Ah-ah-ah, I'm not finished," Naruto quipped, cutting him off in a sing-song voice. "If you accept the dare, and execute it properly–with no short cuts or anything–then I'll pay my entire ramen tab I've got with you."

The Uchiha opened his mouth, already armed with some berating comment, and then closed it in silent contemplation. Naruto owed him a ridiculous amount of money, and he had the receipts in a shoebox somewhere to show it. And he _did _have that motorcycle insurance he had to pay and his groceries _were _a bit low, and he couldn't lie, this offer was more than tempting. So, _why not, _he thought, _how hard would it be to pretend to like someone for a night_?

Naruto wriggled his eyebrows. "Come on, _you know you want to_..."

Sasuke reluctantly grabbed his hand and shook.

"Deal."

-

**-**&**&**&**-**

-

"SAKURA!!!"

"Ino, I'm right here."

"I know that," the blonde retorted, blowing a piece of hair out of her eye. "I'm just worried, is all. Because your date is in less than two hours–count it, two!–and all you've been doing is sitting here, devouring that book."

Sakura flipped the page gently, catching half the words before it touched its destination. She leaned more against the pillows on her bed and maneuvered, worming her way into a comfier position. Flash cards were strewn carelessly across her twisted comforter, peppering her sleeping area like flakes of snow. Quickly, she spared a glance at her best friend of seventeen years and watched as she dragged the small brush achingly slow across her nail, painting it a shimmery blue. They were lounging in their underwear, waiting for the minutes to tick down until it was party time.

She went back to her book. "Well, I've got to finish this and go take my make-up anatomy exam, because _someone_ felt the need to unplug my alarm clock and then fail to tell me that they did so." Her green eyes slanted into a glare in the blonde's direction. "So I'll just meet whoever this Sasuke person is after."

"You're not serious, are you? You _cannot _be serious."

"What?"

Ino sat up, twisting the cap back on her nail polish bottle and gave Sakura a look. In all the years she had know Sakura, from kindergarten to present day, she had always thought that Sakura should take more care in her appearance. Not that she wasn't a lovely little flower or anything, but she always seemed to need that extra little _push _in the right direction. Rummaging through her closet, she threw a couple articles of clothing on the rosette's bed.

"Here, at least if you're not gonna take the time to get ready properly," Ino explained, putting a hand on her hip. "Wear this."

Sakura rolled her eyes and got up, slipping on the outfit. She did a turn in the full length mirror attached to the closet door and tugged at the bottom of her shirt a bit. The outfit Ino had chosen for was surprisingly modest, with a hint of sexy. A simple black shirt with bright paint splatters strewn across it adorned her upper body, sticking to her like second skin, showing off her curvy hourglass figure, and cut in a torn v-neck. The jeans she wore were a simple boot cut, giving her the appearance of height, which sat low–showing off her flat stomach and sensual hip bones.

"Okay," she agreed with a nod, then glanced at the wall clock. "_Shit_, I gotta go Ino-pig."

The blonde frowned at the term of endearment tacked on to the end of her name, leaning against the wall as she listened to her best friend frantically fumble around the apartment before she heard a distant "bye!" and the loud thunder of the front door slamming. Ino chuckled to herself as she walked to the kitchen and grabbed a grape soda out of the refrigerator.

"What're we gonna do with her?"

Ino turned to her brunette roommate.

Tenten sat at the end of the island, slurping at a bowl of cereal in only a black lacy bra and a pair of boy-cut, forest green panties. Her usually dual-bunned hair was loose, trailing down her back in a wavy stream, slightly frizzy and wayward from friction and the masculine touch of fingers. Beside her Neji sat, not looking much different from his companion, sitting in only his striped boxers, a few red angry scratch marks adorning his bare chest, shoulders, and back.

"I honestly don't know," Ino admitted. She leaned her elbows against the granite countertop, sipping at her drink as she watched the two across from her with a sly smile.

"Well, it looks like you two've been busy."

-

-&**&**&-

-

Sasuke glanced at the time on his cell phone.

15 minutes.

He frowned and glimpsed at the empty barstool to his left. The club he been told to meet this girl at was the most popular in town, with the best DJ, drinks, and was opulent with the best-looking people one could find. He tapped the bar counter with an impatient sigh, trying to ignore the flirtatious smiles and heavy-lidded winks he was getting from the all barely dressed girls in the vicinity.

Whoever this girl was, she was–

"Sorry I'm late."

Sasuke turned in his swivel chair and raised an eyebrow.

"You must be Sasuke."

He nodded. "Sakura."

She smiled sweetly and he had to mentally pinch himself to refocus.

She was _exotic_ to say the least, with bright green eyes and pastel pink hair. And her name was Sakura? Obviously her parents weren't very imaginative when they named her. Although, she did have this... energy about her that intrigued him more than he liked, and not to mention she had curves in all the right places. Everything about her was attractive to him, and she had barely even opened her mouth.

He could've slapped himself.

"Out friends aren't very sneaky, are they?"

Sasuke turned his head in the direction she was pointing, and frowned slightly at what he saw. His idiot of a best friend and her best friend–he was guessing–were spying not-so-secretly on them. They could clearly see their heads poking up above the back of the couch they were sitting on, watching them like hawks without eyelids. A ten second staring contest ensued before Naruto's eyes lit up in horrifying realization as he pulled the other blonde down by her shoulder and announced a none-too-quietly "THEY'RE ON TO US!"

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sakura giggle.

In that little bundle of couches, Sasuke could see the others lounging around the stakeout area. He could see Neji with his arm around his girlfriend, NineNine or whatever her name was, giggling over something with Naruto's girlfriend Hinata. And that lazy genius Shikamaru was slouched comfortably against the back of the couch, only his spiky ponytail visible, as the blonde girl badgered him relentlessly.

Sasuke turned back to his "date" for the night. He watched as she waved to Hinata and received a shy smile in return

"So why were you late."

She snapped her head back to him. "Huh?"

"You were fifteen minutes late, why."

"Oh!" She exclaimed, and then gave him an embarrassed smile. "Sorry about that again, I had to take my advanced anatomy midterm exam, and then I couldn't catch a taxi to save my life."

And she was smart too?

Sasuke smirked. "Understandab–"

"YEAH SASUKE–YOU BASTARD, GO!"

The Uchiha turned the owner of that voice with a vicious glare, which gave Sakura enough time to give him a quick once over.

He had that whole dark and mysterious thing going on, with his black leather jacket and blood red shirt underneath. His hair was well taken care of, and she could tell he had some impressive height on her, since she was only about 5'4; he had to be at least six foot or more. And just the way he held himself was sexy, his cool confident demeanor oozing out of every poor on his Greek god physique–his clothes _obviously _not doing their job properly.

She wanted a piece of that action. Actually, now that she thought about it–she wanted the _whole thing_.

"Hey," she heard herself say. "You wanna get out of here?"

Sasuke looked down at the girl in front of him, with her pouty lips and big expressive eyes, and wondered if that idiot across the room actually did a good job this time. He checked if he had everything–wallet, house keys, pocket knife–and nodded.

"Yeah, let's go."

-

-&**&**&-

-

"Taxi!"

_Zoom_.

"Taxi!"

_Zoom_.

"Maybe I should do it."

Sakura sulked next to her date, crossing her arms childishly as her taxi-calling duties were stripped mercilessly from her. It wasn't her fault cab drivers didn't give her the light of day! Sasuke smirked, studying her from his peripheral vision and stepped up to the curb with an authoritative stance.

He looked back at her.

"You know... if we actually want to get some where."

"Shut up."

She gave him a glare, which was quickly accompanied by pouty frown as a taxi drove up to the curb almost immediately after Sasuke had raised his arm to hail one. He shrugged innocently as he opened the door, a silent gesture for her to get in. Sticking her tongue out at him, she slipped in and Sasuke climbed in after her, closing the door.

"Don't do that," Sasuke said suddenly, as the cabbie began to drive.

"Don't do what?"

"Stick your tongue out at me."

She raised an eyebrow. "Why?"

"Because," Sasuke drawled, letting the word rumble in his chest like a deadly roar. Sakura turned to look at him and gulped–when had he gotten so close and when had his lips gotten so near?

He smirked.

"–I _bite_."

-

-&**&**&-

-

His fingers worked at the button of her jeans and unzipped the zipper, attempting to slide them off her hips as she grabbed a fistful of his hair and yanked hard. Sasuke growled in animalistic pleasure and lifted Sakura up, giving her enough leverage to wrap her legs around his waist. He slammed her back against the wall, the vibration making a nearby picture frame crash to floor breaking the glass that held the photo.

"Sorry," he mumbled, as he finished on her mouth and made his way to the side of her neck.

"That's okay, because the truth is–" she gasped, feeling as his back muscles rippled and coiled at her slightest touch. "This isn't even my apartment."

Sasuke smirked against the skin at the junction of her neck and jaw. With one hand on the small of her back, sealing their bodies together, he used the other to find the light switch. Instantaneously, 70 watts invaded the small foyer and part of the adjoined kitchen in yellowish light, illuminating the faces of some unknown family's photograph as they smiled up at them from their place on the wooden floor.

Sakura disentangled her fingers from his hair and reached for the switch, as Sasuke began to make a trail of sloppy kisses and naughty little nips down the side of her neck.

The room went black.

"Oh, _yes_."

-

-&**&**&-

-

Light streamed in through a lone window.

The entire room was bathed in the soft sun of early morning, reflecting off the mirror on the woman's vanity in the corner and onto the already drawn curtains. People bustled about on the streets below, cars honked, and birds sang to their hearts content–but all was silent inside. Only the hushed sound of breathing filled the air, with the occasional shifting of bed sheets as one of the two people occupying the apartment awoke.

Blearily, Sasuke blinked away sleep that had kept temporary residence in eyes, as he tried to sit up, only to be hindered by a slight comforting weight on his chest. Looking down, he was greeted by a pink mane of hair and a slow soft breath coasting down his torso in the form of a girl.

"Sakura?" he muttered.

Said girl moaned sleepily and snuggled closer into the side of his body, unknowingly dragging her fingers up his rippled abdominals to rest on his muscled pectorals. Sasuke smirked and wrapped an arm around her naked shoulders, carefully craning his neck to see the digital clock on the nightstand.

_8:27 am_.

Sasuke ran a hand through his hair, and thought about last night's events. Who knew so much energy could be contained in such a small woman? He looked down at her again. She was a freak of nature, Sakura. And he thought he would never find any girl that could match his sexual stamina, but if could say so himself–last night was _mind blowing_.

The curvaceous body next to him shifted.

"Sakura."

The rosette looked up at him. "Morning Sasuke," she greeted, as she rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and smiled. "Sleep well?"

He nodded.

They stayed like that for a couple seconds, just staring into each other eyes until Sasuke bent down and Sakura met him halfway, capturing each other's lips in a sensual kiss. Sakura began to smile as the kiss was beginning to turn into a little something more, until Sasuke suddenly ripped himself violently away.

She furrowed her eyebrows. "What's wron–"

"Be quiet."

Frowning, Sakura went to go open her mouth, but then she heard it too.

The distinct sound of an unlocking door.

"Shit," Sasuke exclaimed, as he jumped out of bed and began looking for his clothes. "Sakura, hurry up and get dressed. Whoever lives here is just getting home."

She didn't waste her time finding her panties and bra, slipping on her jeans as she stepped into her sneakers. Tying them in sloppy bows, she watched as Sasuke pulled on his shirt with one hand and ruffled his hair with the other. Then Sakura realized something.

"Sasuke, I can't find my shir–"

"_Wow honey, that vacation was great but I'm so glad we're home now_," a voice said from the front of the apartment, as the door creaked open. "_Shit! Did someone break in, is there someone in here? Call the police, and bring the kids over to the lady next door. I'm going to check the place out_."

Crap.

Sakura stared at Sasuke with wide eyes. Heavy footstep resounded in the air as the man of the house walked through the kitchen, gradually getting closer to the master bedroom the two were in. He threw his leather jacket at her and made his way toward the window.

"Wear that, we're going out the fire escape."

He climbed through the window first, helping Sakura out before closing the window. Quickly, they climbed down the six flights of cold metal stairs, waking every single tenant of the apartment building with their bedrooms next to the escape. In the distance, the blare of police sirens added to the saturation of the city bustle, as they finally made it to the ground.

The two were a sight to see–Sakura in jeans and only a bra, wearing Sasuke's leather jacket and Sasuke with his belt and button undone on his jeans, wearing only a wife beater and holding his red shirt. The Uchiha glanced down to his right, taking in the state his sexual compadre. Her hair was still slightly mussed from his rough advances during their wild escapade and her breaths were a bit labored from their descent down eleven flights of stairs, vividly reminding him of the actions that conspired between them only the night before. Drinking in her appearance, Sasuke was thinking about reliving that experience right then.

Yes, right in the alleyway.

"No."

He blinked.

"I know what you're thinking, and no." Sakura glanced up at him. "Although I've been contemplating the exact same thing the entire time we've been standing here–but still, no."

"And why not?"

"Because..." She dragged out, pointing across the street to a local diner. "I'm hungry."

"–And you're treating me to breakfast."

* * *

kind of a boring ending, and I'm sorry about that.  
also it's actually a lot longer than I anticipated, so sorry about that too.  
oh, and Sasuke may be a little ooc. I could be wrong though.  
and don't worry, he wrapped it before he tapped it. if you know what I mean.

um, yeah... tell me how I did, please?


End file.
